Words to live by:

"Be excellent to each other." Bill S. Preston, Esquire
and
"Party on dudes!" Ted Theodore Logan

Any guesses what I did tonight?

Porter Airline? More like Porter AirLAME.

AirCanada flights have always had their ups and downs (get it?!?) but lately I've been hearing that the airline has really had it's work cut out for it with the much smaller (but reportedly better) Porter Airline moving in. I took a chance with Porter this week for a short business trip to Toronto. Verdict: adequate. When it comes down to it, the experience was so ordinary, I don't even feel the need to elaborate. I've booked my Christmas flights through Porter, so I'll give them another chance to live up to their hype. Honestly though, if those flights don't go above and beyond (get it? I am on FIRE!) I'll revert back to my usual plan of purchasing flights on a lowest fare basis.

Decisions, decisions...

It's that time of year again, Nanowrimo time. Well, almost. It's, at the very least, almost time to decide if it's something worth participating in. For those of you who haven't heard, Nanowrimo is a 50,000 word, 30 day writing challenge for the month of November (National Novel Writing Month). 50,000 words is a difficult feat, particularly for novice writers such as myself. Still, having a deadline and a concrete goal is sometimes a great motivating factor to finally sit down and get some writing done.

I attempted Nanowrimo (website here http://www.nanowrimo.org/)last year and did not fare very well at all. I seriously underestimated the amount of writing necessary and was just really unprepared and unable to balance the writing with school, work, and various other commitments. Working full time, I have a more static life schedule this year but I also have more extra-curricular activities. I ALSO have a concrete concept for a manuscript and am in need of some structure and motivation to sit down and crank this story out. So you see, friends, there are a number of pros, and a number of cons. What to do?

At the moment I'm leaning towards a 'yes' because it's a great way to distract from what a bitch of a month November otherwise is. But that is another story, for another day. I'll keep you posted on my decision because, obviously, I'll need eyes for editing afterward! That's right, I'm looking at you.

Recipe for Disaster

This weekend I prepared the most delicious Thanksgiving feast. I got up early to bake fresh artisan bread and then roast a 7kg turkey. It sizzled with thyme butter and was basted with a maple-balsamic peppercorn glaze. I also roasted several bulbs of garlic for a very special batch of roasted garlic mashed potatoes with cream.

Unfortunately, I didn't get to taste any of these items, nor did my roommates or guests. With only a short hour and a half left before my beautiful turkey was set to come out of the oven, disaster struck. After noticing a slightly smokey smell in the air about ten minutes after a baste, I took a peek in the oven to see what wasn't right. I was greeted with a small row of flames along the bottom piece of tinfoil. Not such a big deal, but as I pulled that out and tossed it into the sink, another row popped up and these were much bigger. It was only seconds before everything in the oven had caught up and the flames began to rise out of the oven and upwards.

Fortunately, everything was contained with the help of our kitchen fire extinguisher. However, it was at the expense of my beautiful dinner (seriously, Martha Stewart you guys)which had been completely ruined by the smelly extinguishing powder. My gracious guests were quick to step up and picked up the hosting duties with some delicious roasted chickens, so all was not lost.

The next day was complete clean up since everything in the kitchen and dining room had been covered with a film of powder and soot. So, that was fun.

While I do have the excuse of an old oven and too many hours spent on a high temperature, the fire was certainly preventable. My advice to others: Clean that jerk as often as possible. Even the smallest amount of baked on crumbs are enough to ignite should some grease happen to drip over the element.

My advice to myself: Buy a self cleaning oven.

Christmas countdown!

Okay, I know it's early but if you're like me and try to give gifts with a personal touch, you have to get a head start lest you find yourself overwhelmed by a dozen half-finished DIYs with only a week before the big day. In the past I've been known to do a bit of holiday baking, some knitting, sewing, painting, and a number of other projects that display of my inherent lack of artistic ability (but always get an A for effort!)

I have a few new tricks up my sleeve for this year's holiday and, at the risk of ruining a few surprises, have found the best website ever to help me out.
www.radicalcrossstitch.com A friend of mine has the 'Fuck Patriarchy' sampler, a definite must for everyone's Christmas mantle. It'll look great next to the stockings hung by the chimney with care.

Google Shame

Admit it, you Google yourself. It's okay though, we all do it. I like to do it whenever I know something new will appear. Sometimes boring things come up like the names of old schools but sometimes more fun (fun to me at least!) results like conference presentations or works of writing appear. Unfortunately, as many of us have discovered, the internet does not always allow us to discriminate about what issues are and are not revealed. Ideally only the good news and proud accomplishments would be made available to the public, however, there are the occasions that an indiscretion pops up and there is little to be done to stop it. The good news is that if you're willing to do some reconnaissance and be persistent, the unwanted Googles may sometimes be erased. Such was the case of my Google shame.

Now that it's gone, I can provide a bit of context. You see, back in highschool I was naive and less discriminating about where I displayed my creative writing. Apparently I didn't feel that a school issue of student works was sufficient. I thought the internet was the perfect solution. It was online that I posted a poem about cross country skiing (deep, I know), a hobby which I love now as I did then. I did fall out of love with the poem, however, and it drifted from my mind with a handful of other less-than-fond high chool memories. Much to my great distress, a personal Google search revealed this atrocious prose on the Lulu site that had acquired poetry.com, where I had originally published said work. The worst part? I had no idea what password/address/secret code/ridiculous identifier I had used so many years ago.

Well, my friends, it is with GREAT relief that I can now tell you that after no less than 11 emails to Lulu support and three months of waiting, the poem has been removed, and with it goes my Google shame.

The moral of this story is two fold: First, if you find yourself in a sticky situation, sometimes pestering the hell out of the administration will actually achieve results; Second, be careful what you post on the internet. It may reappear a decade later to remind you of your unfortunate 'poet' phase.

I'd probably eat the marshmallow...

The Book of Negroes/ Someone Knows My Name

I have about a twenty minute bus ride to and from work. With this time, and the time spent waiting at the bus stop, I do quite a bit of reading. I picked up the habit while living in Toronto. Prior to that, I was content to listen to music and daydream. My commute to downtown, with buses and the subway, allowed for a tonne of book time. Now, I feel completely distracted and impatient on public transportation without some fiction to carry me to any other place.

My most recent bus book was The Book of Negroes by Lawrence Hill. It's an amazing story and I highly recommend it. However, I'm not sure it was the wisest selection for myself considering where I chose to read it. My emotions tend to run high as I can completely lose myself in a story. Ordinarily this would not be a problem but with The Book of Negroes, I was moved to tears more often than I can count. I noticed on more than one occasion that fellow bus riders were peering curiously at me as I sniffled and choked my way from stop to stop. This is not to say that it's an altogether sad and depressing book- quite the opposite actually. While there are many heart-wrenching chapters, the heroine of the story, Aminata Diallo, also has her share of triumphs that left me feeling proud each time I closed the pages and exited the bus. Trust me, I'm an escapist who turns to fiction to lift her mood. If a story makes me cry and I still recommend it, you can believe it's worth the read.

In the USA it's published as Someone Knows My Name by Lawrence Hill.

Check it out here.

I am Canadian.

It's been sweeping the nation, but in case you've missed it, this one's for you b'y!

Review: Stuff White People Like

I've been flipping through Stuff White People Like by Christian Lander. My verdict: Entertaining, enjoyable, and at least mildly offensive. I love how it's so simply broken down into a basic list of 'stuff' that is accompanied by brief, humorous descriptions. This format is especially appropriate as it allows me to consume a few items, then close the book and walk away when the text becomes too irritating (and it almost always does). Despite the agitated state with which I always depart the reading, I find that I can never stay removed completely as I repeatedly return for another helping or two. Still, sometimes I can't help but wonder if the book isn't as tongue-in-cheek as readers may choose to believe.

According to a survey at the end of the list, I am extremely white. I suppose I must be because almost everything in the book sounds appealing. I love dinner parties, reusable grocery bags, grammar, Indie music, and breakfast. God, I really love breakfast... Do these things make me lame? Ordinary? Predictable? I'm not really sure, but I certainly felt like that's what the text was implying. Still, it's a humorous read and I'd recommend it to anyone who isn't as sensitive (and dare I say indignant?) as myself.

Check out his blog for a literary amuse-bouche or two.
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/